True Friend or Just Friendly?
One of the things we look for in a friend is someone who will accept us as we are and love us no matter what. Is Jesus that kind of friend? Does he really love us or is he just putting up with us? Does he seem distant a lot of the time because he’s trying to keep his distance — maybe because of the odor?
Let’s look at the facts: the Son of God became a human being and made a home on planet earth. He didn’t just stay the weekend; he stayed for 33 years. From the beginning, reactions to his coming would have more than justified his bailing out. Herod tried to kill him. So did the town where he was raised. So did the religious authorities, and so did the Roman authorities. His own disciples continually tested his patience. Yet he made a practice of seeking out the most obvious and notorious scumbags, and had a reputation for being “a friend of tax collectors and ’sinners.’ ” When the powers-that-be banded together to crucify him, he responded by saying, “Father, forgive them; they don’t know what they’re doing.” In other words, the facts tell us that Jesus could handle being around both sin and sinners. He didn’t throw up. He didn’t avert his eyes. He didn’t escape to the desert to establish a spiritual country club. He never once said, “The hell with it.” He went the full 12 rounds, the full life-cycle with us.
That doesn’t mean he never got frustrated, pissed even. But while people abandoned him, he never abandoned them. He never walked away. At such times, he would engage more, not less. Ultimately Jesus left, not so that he could get away from all of us, but so that he could be even more present, more engaged, more involved (i.e. through his Spirit). In Matthew’s gospel, his last words are, “And surely I will be with you always, to the very end of the age.”
Instead of being glad to be done with the 24/7 hassles of teaching, living with and hand-holding his disciples, after his resurrection Jesus told his disciples to go and make disciples of all nations. He didn’t tell them to seek out the cream of the spiritual crop. In fact, if there is anything we know from the gospel accounts, Jesus is always on the look-out for those who will give him the greatest challenge. They just have to be willing. They can’t cling to the ”goodness” they already have and figure that’s “good enough.” They have to be willing for a complete makeover, however long that takes, which is the rest of our lives, which is why one never graduates from being a disciple, which Jesus knew before he ever called us.
Does Jesus accept us as we are? Absolutely. Does he allow us to stay that way? Absolutely not. While Jesus could more than handle being around sin and sinners, he saw sin for what it was — deadly. There was no time to lose. Jesus’ basic teaching method was shock and awe. He knew people, all people. He knew that no one wants change; we only want the benefits of change. We avoid the process of change like the plague. But sin is the plague.
We read the gospels and think, “Jesus was sure hard on people.” That doesn’t seem to have been what people people thought back then. John the Baptist, Jesus’ prophetic forerunner, thought that Jesus wasn’t being nearly hard enough on people. John even began to doubt if Jesus “was the one.” Jesus’ disciples thought that raining down fire from heaven once in a while was more than called for. It’s likely that Judas betrayed him and the rest of the disciples abandoned him, at least in part, because he wasn’t violent enough for them. He wouldn’t even defend himself.
Do you know what’s really unnerving about being Jesus’ friend? With him it’s possible to be both fully known and fully loved. None of us has ever experienced that kind of friendship, not completely. We assume that anyone would be disgusted if they were to see everything that passes through our heads and hearts, especially someone as sinless as Jesus or as holy as the “Holy” Spirit. We assume that God has to be constantly wincing, constantly averting his eyes, keeping his distance until we can finally get our act together.
Jesus knew that Judas was going to betray him, Peter disown him and the rest of the Twelve abandon him — the very night he washed their feet. Washing feet caked with mud and manure was nothing compared with what he would endure by refusing to jump ship the next 24 hours. That was the night Jesus said to the Twelve, “I no longer call you servants but friends.” It was later that night, after Judas kissed him, that Jesus said, “Friend, do what you came for.”
Sisters and brothers, Jesus is the best friend you will ever have.
